Zomboner (2014)-(Full Movie in Article!)- Just When I Thought I Had Seen Every Type of Zombie Movie- Fitz of Horror Retro Review

Bryan Fitzgerald (Fitz of Horror) March 22, 2019

Synopsis– Jack Hoff is what amounts to a fat, lazy, unemployed jerk who has endless desires to have sex. In fact, his organ is almost always sticking out. He jacks hoff all the time. His “friends,” however, like to have him around because he’s such a jerk that he helps them score.

I’ve seen a countless amount of zombie films over the years featuring the reanimated likes of humans, birds, sheep, chickens, zoo animals, handicapped kids and nearly everything else with a pulse but this is the first time I have seen a zombie dick as the star of its own film. Life is complete.

Zomboner follows a day in the life of Jack Hoff (Tripp Dewey), a horny, perverted, egotistical man-child that has no idea how to talk to or treat women. He is the perfect wingman for 3 locals who use him to offend and turn off women so they come flocking to them. One evening Jack finds himself in a unique situation when a beautiful woman who is currently drunk and on the rebound willingly leaves the bar with him looking to score. Jack’s luckiest night quickly turns into the worst night of his life when the woman’s jealous boyfriend sees them together outside the bar and runs poor Jack down mid blow job ultimately killing him with a raging hard-on……see where this is going?!

The first 30 minutes of this 50-minute short film is surprisingly hilarious with several vulgar and original one-liners that actually had me laughing out loud. After the penis zombification, Jack becomes a Tourettes-like zombie who yells one-word profanities as his Zomboner leads him through town seeking revenge and booty. The movie as a whole is against all odds quite an enjoyable watch and genuinely funny.

With writer/director Steve Boliek’s blessing I am able to present to you the full Zomboner film here in this review! Do I even need to remind you that this short film is definitely NSFW?!

Without further ado, I present to you in all of its vulgar and hilarious glory……ZOMBONER!!!